FIND YOUR LOVE MATCH

The Four Love Types: Four Personality Types by Love Expert Dr. Helen Fisher

Many people believe that true love is the work of unseen forces behind the moon and stars, that soul mates are cosmically brought together in a moment of serendipity that begets a life of laughter, no troubles, and happily ever after.

And then there’s science.

While the idea of meeting the perfect man and clicking with him and dancing forever sounds very nice indeed, in reality true love doesn’t look much like it does in the movies.

If you are looking for the perfect man, you will be looking forever. Instead, search for the perfect man for you. To know who that is, you have to know yourself, and anthropologist and love expert Dr. Helen Fisher has come up with a theory of four distinct personality types to help you. If you know your type and can spot the distinctive traits in other people, you’ll be able to rule out those men you won’t get along with and focus on the ones that you will. While this is just a theory and not hard science, it makes a lot more sense than the moon and stars.

THE FOUR PERSONALITY TYPES: WHICH ONE ARE YOU?

There are four personality types, each associated with a certain neurotransmitter or hormone. Can you spot yours?

The Explorer (dopamine) loves adventures and new experiences. Highly creative and artistic, explorers like taking risks and are curious and enthusiastic about their world. Explorers love to learn, have a high energy level and are very flexible mentally. Optimistic and energetic, explorers often have careers in the arts or other exciting and changeable industries.

The Builder (serotonin) is calm, cautious and social. Builders are sensible and conventional; they are the guardians of tradition, preferring structure and rules. Builders make great managers and are skilled in building social networks of families and communities.

The Director (testosterone) is analytical and assertive, and can be very focused. A rational thinker who is guided by reasoning, Directors like to stay in control of their emotions- and in control of many other things as well. Bold and competitive, this personality type is decisive, exacting and very good at strategic thinking.

The Negotiator (estrogen) sees the big picture. Idealistic and empathetic, Negotiators create warm homes and are very intuitive. They are verbally adept, imaginative, and masters at reading people. Agreeable, nurturing, idealistic and emotionally expressive, Negotiators are holistic thinkers who like to make sure things run smoothly.

Did you recognize yourself? Probably so. Although most humans express many of these traits at the same time, one persona probably struck you as fitting better than others. So what does this mean for your love life?
Dr. Fisher’s theory (which is backed up by heaps of studies) shows that sometimes humans are attracted to their matches, and sometimes to their opposites. When it comes to things like religious values, socioeconomic background and level of intelligence and attractiveness, humans overwhelmingly choose at mate who is very similar.

But personality is a different matter.

Explorers like Explorers. Craving excitement and new things, they value curiosity and spontaneity – and they want someone to share it with. This couple will travel to new places together, try the fish eye soup and laugh about it later.

Builders like Builders. This type likes working and bringing people together and are good at building networks of friends and family. Sensible about money and family, this pair values security over all else and will create a solid home.

Directors like Negotiators, and Negotiators like Directors. These two types are attracted to each other because they balance each other out; Negotiators see the big picture from every angle and Directors focus on the nitty-gritty and taking action.

These four personality types can give you a rich insight on which mates are a good match for you. To find out more and take a quiz to correctly determine your personality type, check out this website http://www.chemistry.com/, run by Dr. Helen Fisher herself. It’s also an online dating site but don’t worry, you can take the quiz and leave to look for your Explorer, Builder, Negotiator or Director.

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Shilo Urban is a freelance writer who has relocated to Los Angeles after her previous homes of Seattle, New Zealand, Paris, Maine, and Austin. She is an active member of the West Coast electronic music community and lives to promote the art that she loves and the people who create it.