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How To Know If He Is Lying
Untitled Document

HOW TO KNOW IF HE IS LYING

Are You Suspicious Of Your Mate? Here Are Ways To Know If He Is Lying!

Do you remember this joke:

How can you tell if a man is lying?

-Is his mouth open?

Of course. No one lies all the time, not even men. However everyone lies sometimes. One study showed that in a ten-minute conversation, the average person fibbed six times. Or fudged it. Stretched the truth, told a little white lie, exaggerated a bit.

When humans lie, we are saying something we know to be untrue, and this makes us nervous. Our blood pressure rises, and we seek to pacify ourselves with small and often subconscious gestures like rubbing our faces or crossing our arms. They can be very fast, but can be spotted by an attendant observer.

In the end, you must listen to your gut. Your “gut” is really your subconscious mind, which picks up on cues from your environment that your conscious thoughts do not. While logically you may have no reason to doubt a certain person, if your gut is screaming otherwise, listen to it. It is picking up on micro-gestures and other behavioral cues that you have learned in the past indicate deceit and know to be true, even if your conscious brain doesn’t quite know why.

However please note: you will never know 100% if a person is lying. Even FBI agents who have interrogated suspects for an entire career admit that there is no foolproof lie detector, machine or otherwise. There are no hard and fast rules, only guidelines that put together give a strong indication that someone is lying, male or female. These following gestures just show that the person making them is nervous- hiding something, or uncomfortable in some way and seeking to pacify himself.

IS HE LYING TO YOU?

- Is he giving you intense eye contact, or almost none?

- Does his story have way too many details, or almost none?

- Does he always suspect you of deceit and often accuses you of cheating, etc? Treacherous of heart suspects treachery of all others.

- Does he have his hands in his pockets, his arms folded, or is using something like a chair or another item to otherwise physically block his body from yours? Physical blocking means he is also trying to block the truth from getting out of brain.

- Does his voice get higher when he answers your questions?

- Does he get very defensive when asked simple questions like, “What did you do last night?”

- Does he switch details of the story around?

- When you ask him a question, do his eyes look to the right? When humans try to remember past events, their eyes look to the left. When thinking about future events (or making things up as they go), their eyes shift to the right.

- Does he rub his face, neck, hands or legs?

- Does he touch his nose?

- Does he lock his legs around the back of his chair?

- Is he acting very different than normal? Is a usually laid-back guy being uptight, or a high-strung individual all of a sudden a loose goose?

- Is he using a lot of hand gestures for emphasis to his story? He thinks his words need support. Is he making no gestures? He is afraid that his hands will give him away.

- Does he momentarily cover his mouth with his fingers?

- Does he shrug often or do the “hand shrug,” a variant of the shoulder shrug, which involves the palms turning upward, and out? A shrug represents apathy and expresses diminished responsibility, and is a way to distance himself from the lies he is telling.

 

Overall, the better you know someone, the more easily you will be able to tell if he is lying, because you will be familiar with his usual behavior and can determine when he diverts from it. Listen to your gut, don’t be blinded by your heart, and in the end- make a decision with your brain.

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Shilo Urban is a freelance writer who has just relocated to Los Angeles after her previous homes of Seattle, New Zealand, Paris, Maine, and Austin. She is an active member of the West Coast electronic music community and lives to promote the art that she loves and the people who create it.



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