FINDING A NEW LOVE
Tips on How to Start Fresh in a New Relationship
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|Have you ever wondered why all your past relationships never made it as far as you had hoped? For women who travel down the same road over and over, but expect to end up somewhere different each time, read on to learn about love tips that could make your next relationship a lasting one. |
TIP #1: GET OVER YOUR SO-CALLED "TYPE"
How can we believe that it is possible to know what the man who is going to adore us for the rest of his life looks like?
Where does the “type” that we are initially attracted to come from? It could be many factors. Maybe it is an image we grew up with, such as a father or an older brother that we were comfortable with as a child. Maybe it is the “look” of your high school crush or a celebrity that you find sexually attractive. Whatever the reasoning may be, be open to different possibilities and don’t close yourself off to someone who might not necessarily fit your “type”. He could very well be the love of your life!
TIP #2: KEEP YOUR MIND OPEN TO ANY AND ALL EXPERIENCES
Yes, physical attraction is necessary, but guys will either get cuter or become repulsive as you get to know their personality traits. We all have heard of the drop dead gorgeous guy who after three dates fits the description of “jerk” instead of “gorgeous.”
TIP #3: BECOME AWARE OF ANY "UNHEALTHY NORMS"
Your norm is that which you are usually attracted to when it comes to men. Being aware of our “unhealthy norms” enables us to see any red flags waving that remind us of a past failed relationship.
If you choose to travel down the same “rough road” over and over and over again, you will fall into the same “potholes” over and over and over again. Are you currently traveling down a road that you have traveled before? Did you like where you ended up last time? Go down this check list too see if you are traveling down the same road to a failed relationship:
Are you choosing the same looking men? (Placing no regard on who the man actually is.)
Are you choosing the same personality over and over again? (Because you are initially attracted to what you're used to.)
Are you comfortable in a relationship because this man reminds you of someone else? (Perhaps someone you couldn't have.)
Maybe what you are initially attracted to is exactly what the last relationship did not fulfill? (Choosing to ignore everything else.)
TIP #4: TAKE NOTE OF YOUR DATING BEHAVIOR
What role do you play? What do you want to attract or repel?
Be brave! Be okay with yourself and acknowledge the good characteristics you have been attracted to and the bad characteristics that have attracted you for some reason.
Spending time with someone may allow you to fall in love, even though you were not initially attracted to that person. Just as you spending time with him will allow him to fall in love with you (quirky imperfections and all).
| ||Ranee Alison Spina is a nationally known relationship researcher and leadership speaker who has appeared on radio and TV stations across the country. Her book I AM before “I DO,” received the USA Book News National Book Award. Email questions, comments or feedback to: email@example.com |
This column is for entertainment purposes only. The views expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of the publishers.