9 EMPOWERING THINGS TO DO IN 2009 Forget about the worn out resolutions that were made last year. Take 9 new steps to empower yourself in 09.

1) SAY GOODBYE AND GOOD LUCK TO THE BOYFRIEND WHO ISN'T ALL THAT.

It’s time to say, “Hey, it’s been great, you’re great, but we want different things in life.” Relationships should bring out the best in you, not give you reason to say one of the following:

• He’s better than nothing.

• What if no one else falls in love with me?

• I know I’ll never marry him.

• I’m not number one in his life.

2) CLEAN OUT YOUR CLOTHES CLOSET.

Make room in your closet for new “stuff.” Clutter blocks inspirational, creative energy. You probably bought something new over the holidays, so donate all those clothes and shoes that make you feel less than fabulous.

3) TAKE A BATH AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK. Showering is quick, but it does not enhance the intimate relationship we have with our own body. There is a sensuous element to taking a bath with aromatherapy oils and candles. In today’s fast-paced society, it is important to nurture that feeling of well-being that comes from relaxation.

4) LISTEN TO A MOTHER'S WORDS: DRINK MORE WATER, GET MORE SLEEP, WALK TALLER.

Women that exude confidence practically glow. Drink water: Flush out the chocolate chip cookies and red wine you had last night. Your skin will benefit too. Sleep more: Did you know that your digestive system needs 9 hours of sleep to function properly? You won’t miss those dark circles either. Improve posture: Pull in your stomach, roll your shoulders back and down, and hold your chin up. You’ll know that you’re walking correctly if it feels like you’re sticking your boobs out!

5) SWITCH UP YOUR ROUTINE. We are such creatures of habit that it inhibits us from meeting new people and experiencing the world. Visit a different gym, shop at a different grocery store, and eat at a different restaurant. Take a cooking class or a dance class. A new experience will heighten your senses, and tackling a new endeavor will put you on a natural high.

6) KISS 3 NEW GUYS

You will never know what a great kiss is if you don’t smooch a few guys to compare kissing styles. Work on your lip-locking moves for there is no better way to let a guy know you are completely into him.

7) EMAIL SOMEONE FROM THE PAST AND SAY, "I'M SORRY".

Liberate yourself from any past situation that is weighing on your heart. It’s not about re-opening communication or picking up where you left off; it’s about simply apologizing for ungracious behavior in the chaos of an emotional moment.

8) TAKE IN A BEAUTFUL VIEW. Get outside. Look at the ocean, or a mountain, or even the sky. Take a big breath in and look with amazement at a view that forces you to remember that the beauty of nature is the best anti-depressant.

9) READ A BOOK THAT WILL MAKE YOU LAUGH ABOUT LOVE.

Those who can laugh at matters of the heart will always have a healthy relationship. The secret is to not make the same laughable, foolish mistakes more than twice.

Ranee Alison Spina is a nationally known relationship researcher and leadership speaker who has appeared on radio and TV stations across the country. Her book I AM before “I DO,” received the USA Book News National Book Award. Email questions, comments or feedback to: ranee@iambeforeido.com

This column is for entertainment purposes only. The views expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of the publishers.